Saturday, October 31, 2009

Curnow vs Motion (Blog Battle)

Dear faithful blog reader

There was a time when writers would quietly stow themselves away and compete for space in prestigious journals by writing the best piece they could. Or they held up another writer as some kind of creative nemesis, a necessary yardstick for their own ambition/progress.

But now, thanks to the wonders of the blogosphere, we can go head-to-head in public smackdowns that immediately determine whose work has impact, relevance, appeal, musicality, sexuality, popularity, freshness, verbal vaporessence, grounding, counterbalancing and a well-developed ‘haunting yet transparent’ latency of meaning.

So thus I challenge poet Derek Motion to the first ever Australian Poetry Blog Battle!!!

For three-weeks we will be competing for comments (support or trash-talk), tallying them up in order to determine our own inter/national significance. Why? Because we’re very important pioneers in the Australian literary scene. Because we’re about ‘conversation’ and intellectual rigour. And while I don’t have anything against Derek personally (the only trouble is his personality) I do really REALLY want to bring him down. Plus he still owes me $20 bucks for a late-night six pack and Chicko Roll in Albury! Will he even acknowledge that... I don't think so.

This is how it goes:

The tally is of comments posted on our “Blog Battle” posts which remain up and open for three weeks (culminating in the Melb Four W launch). Thereby the competition shall be declared over and the winner annouced.

The poet who receives the most comments on their blog will bask in validation, knowing that it truly confirms their poetic worth, the relevance of their practice and their place in Australia’s literary canon.

In turn, the loser must abandon their blog FOREVER and go home crying to his momma. And with any luck it'll be Derek, with this taped over his mouth: http://ilovestickytape.blogspot.com/2009/10/poem-on-roll-charles-bainbridge.html

Now thems the stakes and the only rules. Oh, plus the variety of commenters will also be taken into account. So I’m calling for support from the big and little names in Australian literature, to the big and little names in Portland’s over 55 cross-stitching guild. If you’ve ever enjoyed my poetry but never bought a book… or if you bought a book but never enjoyed the poetry… I need you now. Talk it up. Send out the message. He was in the 'top 50 writing blogs' and in Best Aust Poems 09

I’ve got my work cut out for me!

I know that in the past much of my blog has been about self-promotion. I know. And you might even think this Battle is a bit over-the-top too. But check out my last post about the Thar. I mean that’s good work, that’s contributing, and it’s a prime example of what you’re not gonna see anymore if I happen to get shut down in this vain (yet let’s not forget ‘groundbreaking’) maelstrom of words.

Plus I invented the Fb DanceTrain… I INVENTED it!!!

Oh and here’s a link to Derek’s blog: http://typingspace.wordpress.com/

83 comments:

Carolyn said...

Alright Nathan, if I put a post here, and say I really love your work and I can't understand why you didn't win first prize in the Adelaide Plains Poets competition you entered a couple of years ago, that counts right? And if I say I hope your ghosts collection wins big in all of the big poetry awards in Australia, I'm sure plenty of others will agree with me.

Revving the Engine said...

Surely writing about the blog off is cheating? Reckon you should lose points...

That said, I've been reading your book, starting with the poems set in Monte Cristo, because my mum has been there and that seems as good a place to start as any :)

Gerg! said...

Hey Nathan

So, The Ghost Poetry Project is amazing. Whoever decided to publish it is a genius! Yeeehaaa!!!

Gerg!!!

theotheradamford said...

as a fellow ballaratarian i am driven to support you in this endeavour, nathan, though motion makes a strong case against you. i'm torn. why couldn't this be a battle between - oh i don't know - john laws and sean m. whelan? no wait that's not as clear cut as i was hoping for (don't underestimate the man who gave us Results of Love) how about jewel versus les murray? yeah that's a choice i could see myself making, but curnow v. motion? i guess i'll just have to comment (or not) based on the merit of each post.

one of you will be missed...

Miles Allinson said...

have we started yet?

I LOVE YOU NATHAN!!! but i find the whole thing vulgar.

also i wish the beer didnt come in these plastic cups.

Ezra Bix said...

Nathan Curnow is a prince among poets! If he has a stomach for battle, I am happy to shout him a a boar on a spit, a vat of wine, a shield and a mace.

Katie said...

To be fair, I'm going to leave a comment here as well. I've never met you, but I've heard about you.... the Internet is a small place.

Fiona said...

Comment. This is my comment. Love your work Nathan, fight hard until the end, and blog much. Is it multiple blogs? Or just this blog? I'm not so up with the whole blog thing, took me 10mins to find this. But i'll be blogging more don't you worry!! Keep up the good work... Fi ;)

jools said...

Just read 'Those Adamant Shapes' in last year's Best Australian Poems - lovely stuff!

genevieve said...

Comments are not a measure of success, ladies and gentlemen, IZ LINKZ, WE HAZ THEM.

http://austlit.typepad.com/cfn/2009/09/curnow-nathan.html

You should get extra points for comments with links to original reviews, mon.
This is a fine publicity stunt, however. Bring on Four W.

genevieve said...

you could also have considered a poetry joust using captchas from Blogger, they are definitely a new language. Let us know if you want any captured anytime.

*jolys*

genevieve said...

it is a far, far better blog that you do...oh, never mind.

*laiddest*

Permapoesis said...

this cld well be a contest between narrative driven content (wordpress dudes) and verbi-voco-visual (blogspotters). ah but yes, but no; in transition or for expansion?

genevieve said...

yesbutnobutyesbut

your enemy is sending out group emails, Mr C

*cably*

emilie zoey baker said...

Curnow in poetry in Motion

Carolyn said...

Oh Nathan, you silly thing, you put two posts on Derek's blog! I'm glad you come from round these parts, that's another reason to like you. Adelaide Plains Poets have another competition going at the moment.
Theme = Life, the universe and
everything. If any of the wonderful people visiting here want more info, get in touch thru my Poetic Pause blog o click on my name and it will take you there then copy and paste entry form and guidelines. And if you know of any young students who write poetry, give them a copy too!

bean said...

CURNOW CURNOW! shouting out form across the sea!
Best Aussie poet I know by far (I don't actually know any others shhh).
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.
I have ever faith you will win this ridiculous competition.
Spreading the word, and its Curnow...

Luis Gonzalez Serrano said...

So I think you should have set other rules: Blogger's self comments don't count. Blogger's cross-comments are own-goals (you've kicked three), and any comments from people that have published either poet or booked them for a gig should count for two. It might be fudging the rules as you go along, but it looks like you need it right now. Good luck!

taramokhtari said...

I don't get it.

You want bloggers
to comment on blog posts
about a blog competition
and the blog about the competition
is the blog of
the competition itself?

Or is the blog of the competition yet to be posted.
Since you're meant to be poets, I'd have assumed
you'd be posting poems
for comments,
not just an announcement
about a blog competition
that ends before it's begun.

Kind of weird that
between two alleged poets,
there's not a poem in sight.

I don't get it,
but I hope you win.
I hope you win because
I know you to
actually write poems,
even if they are not here,
and they are good poems.
I'm a poet's poet,
I hope you win,
but I don't get it.

jenjen said...

extra points for blog posts that link back to the battle?

i have the tweedle beetle battle from fox in socks stuck in my head now. thanks a lot.

jenjen said...

also, begging is pathetic. so thar!

Tim said...

The

Tim said...

more

Tim said...

the

Tim said...

merrier

Tim said...

right?

Cameron said...

Go Nathan--all of Tassie is behind you. I speak for all 46 of us. Good luck!

Steven said...

Go Nathan! But maybe there is room for 2 great poets in this vast nation (and itty bitty poetry reading population) of ours!
Corry

Lapkat said...

If I can't have the Barry Gibb Talk Show I can at least have the Nathan Curnow Blog.
Even without the cream suits it's got the funky.

Can I has my martini now?

NadineC said...

Can I write a limerick? Does that count?

There once was a bloke from the 'Rat
He started a war with some prat*
The blog comments flew
'Til one of them knew
That his blog days were done
Who was that?

*no offence, Derek

Well, you did want variety...

Local said...

is this what poets do instead of a bake-off?

Benedict said...

It gives me profound and lasting pleasure to comment on this blog.

Benedict said...

ps if you lose, Nathan, will your new blog be called Poet Eats Blog?

theotheradamford said...

Hey Nathan - I have celebrated your battle with a picture. I am procrastination king today!

http://theotheradamford.wordpress.com/2009/11/05/two-blogs-enter-one-blog-leaves/

lisa said...

Nooo! You cannot leave the blogosphere! You are the only person in history who has ever linked to a picture of my dog. The web would be a sadder place without you...

Stu said...

(I'm posting this comment on both blogs at the same time b/c I'm an idle fence-sitter)

Questionable colonialist metaphors and Thars aside, Derek and Nathan are a pair of battlers 'in the true sense'.

They may actually be the same person... taking self-promotion to uncharted heights.

Prediction: the loser will start a new blog under a tasteless pseudonym and do for bush poetry what Ern Malley did for modernism.

Carolyn said...

I still think duelling haiku would have been a better idea.

CateK said...

Nathan, Nathan, Nathan...
I hold you in such esteem I've actually set up my first Google account to leave this comment - yep, I'm a blog comment virgin. I was saving myself for you, obviously. Because you're fantastic. I luv Nathan 4eva. Etc. And by the way I nominated The Ghost Poetry Project as my favourite 'book find' of the year in the Readings poll. Loved it.
Cate K

genevieve said...

nathan haz some serious attention

*confr*

genevieve said...

but he needs to catch up srsly

*bration*

genevieve said...

adam's picture is wonderful, better than the fight itself I think

*nories*

I agree with Stu, I don't think this will end here.

alijanesmith said...

I think Pam Brown already won this battle.

http://poetictalks.blogspot.com/

marcuscurnow said...

Oh the depths... Although it is pleasing to see the term 'smackdown' appearing more often in literary circles.

paddy said...

when i was in primary school, there were two girls who went around getting everyone to sign their workbooks. i guess that was a bookoff.

Ivy said...

Don't
me
between,
two

[see the other half at the other blog]

Tharlady said...

ah, the tyranny of dizzy poet stance. I think the Thar will have some wise wise words about this ol blogoff. wise words. like um...Always aim at complete harmony of thought and word and deed. (shhh you know Gandhi stole that line from a Thar)

Geoff said...

Carolyn, you're right. It will. If it doesn't, a grave injustice will have been done. Nathan, in the words of Team America, I love your balls.

Tharlady said...

OMG Klare Lanson made me aware of this fact... Derek Motion and Nathan Curnow also both do battle in the latest issue of Going Down Swinging! No.29 is launching in Melbourne on Tuesday 17th November at the Northcote Social Club. 7.30pm. Page vs Voice. There will be blood. (she's a shameless promoter that Lanson)

Sean M Whelan said...

Stupidest battle ever. But you do of course have my support 100%.

John said...

Nathan, I wish I could offer you a big literary name, but, Alas, John Holton is neither BIG nor literary. If I add my middle name, Stuart, then it's a little bit bigger, but that's the best I can offer. That and my undying support in your quest to crush the poetic infidels. May all your phantoms be happy.
John

theotheradamford said...

and curnow leaps ahead! current count at 15:27 on 7-11-09 = motion: 48, curnow: 50!

Well, 51 counting this one...

Ben Langdon said...

I'll post but I don't ever want to join in the FB Dance Train thing. Facebook and Dancing should not mix.

Good luck with the blog obliteration!

Miles Allinson said...

i dont get it either. i was expecting more blood, more waxing of eye cuts, more scrapping after the bell. i wanted you to bring a little lamb into the ring with you. anyway. ahoy

mamacita said...

Shit, sorry. I was actually looking for the Celebrity Masterchef site.

Laurie Steed said...

Nathan Curnow is:

a) The king of R and B, and

b) so full of action his name should be a verb.

Ain't no party like a Curnow party. Ghost...to ghost.

Steven said...

2012
Opens Thursday.
You know you want to.

zenobiafrost said...

Hey there groover,

Because we trespassed spectacularly in Tassie with a bottle of bubbly, my vote goes to you, sir.

- Zen

A. S. Patric said...

Alright. You've got my vote, but I want to see more on the Thar.

lorindak said...

Yes, me too..

Thar Thar!

That has a ring about it don't you think. Imagine Nathan saddled to teh beast urging onwards, forwards....

Thar Thar!

Take that Motion

lorindak said...

Thar!

Katie Yoo! said...

So it's the Pimp Wolf fighting off the Chinese burn giving ninjas, it's a sad tale. you should ask the S&M pussy cat to help you out, her whip will strike them down when great vengence...oh and she can shoot too!!! you should have gone for the sing star battle...no better still does he eat pizza with a knife and fork? who does that these days??? Awwwwww...we do love you and your work!!!

Katie Yoo! said...

what i don't understand is why it takes so long for my comment to appear? does that make it 2 comments now?!

doylie said...

I think there is really only one way to settle this......Drop the letter 'l' in this Blog Battle thingy and I think we can make this really interesting.....

Amanda Anastasi said...

Anyone who wears a bunny suit on a writers festival panel and willingly visits ten haunted sites gets my vote. Legend ;)

Ralph said...

>I LOVE Tassie! so please help me >out. I’m losing big time!

Cameron's here, I'll gee up the other forty-five.

francesca h said...

Curnow for the win!

francesca h said...

Was just thinking about the early days of the ghost poetry project, when you and Andrew and I were listening to the spooky Elvira recording at my house, and we turned the lights out and got ourselves properly freaked out. Good times.

bean said...

C

bean said...

U

bean said...

R

bean said...

N

bean said...

O

bean said...

W

bean said...

(space)

bean said...

R

bean said...

O

bean said...

C

bean said...

K

bean said...

S

bean said...

!

Joe Logan said...

You are my hero Nurnow, with or without your karate kid headband :)

love the interview on the View From Here... waiting patiently for part deux

kiramatali shah said...

With Facebook and Twitter being among the leaders of the Social networks, marketing as a small business is being transformed..
Respondents according to the Vertical Response survey appear to need some differentiation with the use of SE marketing and Social media Marketing
www.onlineuniversalwork.com

Anjali said...

keylogger
Another great post. I will continue to faithfully read all of your posts.